It is in our sinful human nature that we are self-centered and our inward focused culture does nothing to help combat that nature. We have an artificially high opinion of ourselves that effects how we interact and treat others around us; even those that are loved ones. I know that I am no exception. I crave the likes on my post, hope my husband will get up and see to Ethan, and give Ethan a bottle in his crib so I can sleep in an extra half hour instead of truly tending to his needs.
In middle school and high school, the typical youth group rhetoric emphasized the selfish, fallen nature of each individual and how the marriage of the speaker shone a spotlight on that selfishness and spurred change. While I agree with the concept, the application falls short. Yes, living with someone new full time, needing to cleave two separate lives together is bound to bring shortcomings to the surface. But I have never been satisfied with the conclusion that marriage is the only and ultimate way to have my selfish nature revealed and refined.
But that is just the perspective of the newly married. Then a baby comes along and that is the refining fire that purges the mum or dad of their selfish desires. Because, of course, one's whole life is completely up-ended with a baby and never the same again so one doesn't have the time think about themselves. Or so we read on baby boards.
The problem I find with these theories is that revelation and conviction is based on personal experience. We are so focused on experience and personal testimony that we have a hard time contemplating a scenario where God woos our heart through His Words. Also, what if those scenarios don't produce change?
My husband was super easy to get accustom to living with. Ethan has been a laid back baby that hasn't altered our entire way of life {and Dan has been an involved father}. I know that I am guilty of letting my self-centered nature flourish and my situation has allowed that.
No, my marriage and baby have not been a magic cure that has purged my life of my selfish tendencies. Day after day, as I have been reading through my daily study, I have seen myself more clearly in the reflection of the Scriptures. Even my resolution to be in the Word daily has shown me where my priorities lie. And more times than not, I'm at the top of the list.
My life situation at this moment is a mountain, not a valley where suffering produces character {Romans 5:3-5}. My refining fire is Scripture. I don't need a major life event to have Christ shaping and working me to be a better reflection of Him. Just give me Jesus.
Vi ses senare!
Emily
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